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Wild·flow·er: a flower of an uncultivated variety or a flower growing freely without human intervention

Anyone who knows me, knows just how right brained I am. I thrive in abstract ideas and creative thinking. Metaphors and allegories are how I best understand anything. I hate math, science and going about things in a logical sense. This is because when logic fails us, all we have to rely on is our inner feelings and thoughts. Those are what make us who we are. And anyone who really knows me, knows that I think and feel VERY deeply.

Recently I have been reading Hinds’ Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard, and the Lord has been speaking directly to my heart. I came across an excerpt in the book that spoke directly to how I have always felt, without ever being able to find the right words to convey those thoughts. This is the section of the book that resonated so well with me:

“Once the Shepherd stooped and touched the flowers gently with His fingers, then said to Much-Afraid with a smile, “Humble yourself, and you will find that Love is spreading a carpet of flowers beneath your feet.” Much-Afraid looked at Him earnestly. “I have often wondered about the wild flowers,” she said. “It does seem strange that such unnumbered multitudes should bloom in the wild places of the earth where perhaps nobody ever sees them and the goats and the cattle can walk over them and crush them to death. They have so much beauty and sweetness to give and no one on whom to lavish it, nor who will even appreciate it.” The look the Shepherd turned on her was very beautiful. “Nothing my Father and I have made is ever wasted,” He said quietly, “and the little wild flowers have a wonderful lesson to teach. They offer themselves so sweetly and confidently and willingly, even if it seems that there is no one to appreciate them. Just as though they sang a joyous little song to themselves, that it is so happy to love, even though one is not loved in return. “I must tell you a great truth, Much-Afraid, which only the few understand. All the fairest beauties in the human soul, its greatest victories, and its most splendid achievements are always those which no one else knows anything about, or can only dimly guess at. Every inner response of the human heart to Love and every conquest over self-love is a new flower on the tree of Love. Many a quiet, ordinary, and hidden love, unknown to the world, is a veritable garden in which Love’s flowers and fruits have come to such perfection that it is a place of delight where the King of love himself walks and rejoices with His friends. Some of My servants have indeed won great visible victories and are rightly loved and reverenced by other men, but always their greatest victories are like the wild flowers, those which no one knows about.”

“You are like the wildflowers,” I felt Him say to me. How can this be? Something so beautiful, so innocent. I was so confused by this, and in my confusion He met me. I was in worship one morning when I found myself grabbing my journal and pen, before I even knew what words were going to be scribbled on the page. No thoughts entered my mind, but flowed out of what God was speaking to my heart. This is what He said to me,

“Wildflowers.

Beauty that grows in the dark places.

In the wild and unseen places.

Beauty that grows and offers itself up to be loved, regardless of if it receives love back.

Beauty that gives out of the overflow that is itself.

Beauty that grows right where the Lord plants it, not hindered by it’s surroundings.

Beauty that can’t be taken away because beauty is who it is.

That little girl in you is a wildflower.

Something beautiful that grew in the most unlikely of circumstances.

How?

Because the Lord is faithful.

He planted seeds in her heart, light in her eyes, and living water in her veins.

He tended to her all the days of her life.”

If every response to love and conquest over self-love is a flower in my heart, then I have a whole garden. All those circumstances overcome and trials endured are flowers in my garden. What the enemy intended to be thorns, the Lord grew into wildflowers. Because of who Jesus is and how deep His love for me goes, I grew unhindered by my circumstance and the enemy’s intervention. I grew freely and was cultivated by something much greater than anything of this world.

This is how I can love so deeply. This is why there is so much beauty to who I am. I love, regardless of who loves me because love is who I am. My light and my joy and my beauty can not be taken away from me because it is who I am. That is what grew as all those wildflowers grew in my heart. Not cultivated, or hindered by anything in this world. And nothing will ever hinder it because nothing can separate me from the vine that grew all of those wildflowers. The wildflowers that became who I am.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5